Application for Dating my Daughter The last place I would want to be shot is _________________ If I were to be beaten, the last bone I would want broken is ______________ The one thing I hope this application doesn’t ask is ____________________ 8. We have two kids, Brittany (29) and Trevor (25) I am the Senior Vice President for Saving Innocence.
I have a passion for my family and have learned a few things along the way.
APPLICATION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor. The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is: ______________________________________________________________E. __________________________ ______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is: ______________________________________________________________G. ______________________ RULES: Initial each Rule after reading.
NAME_______________________________________ ALIASES ______________DATE OF BIRTH_____________ HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT____________IQ__________ GPA______________ SOCIAL SECURITY#________________DRIVERS LICENSE #________________ IQ _________ BLOOD TYPE _____BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES________________________________________HOME ADDRESS_______________________ CITY/STATE___________ ZIP______Do you have parents? Rule One: If you talk with foul words and dress like a bad ass, a punk or a wanna-be-gangster I will toss you right out on your tush.
It was by far the most viewed and “shared” blog post so far in the life of this project.
In fact several people even asked about a shirt with those 10 rules printed on it.
I came across this today and, since I am the father of three girls, decided to make it public for possible suitors to prepare themselves as well as for other fathers who may need it. ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Church you attend ___________________________________________________How often you attend ________________________________________________When would be the best time to interview your: Father? A woman’s place is in the:______________________________________________________________D. The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:______________________________________________________________E. ______________________________________________________________F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:______________________________________________________________G. __________________I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE._________________________________________________________Applicant’s Signature (that means sign your name, moron!
___ (IF YES TO ANY PART OF #8, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY) 9. Please do not try to call or write (this action will void this application).
If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my: ______________________________________________________________C.
______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________ REFERENCES SECTION: Church you attend _______________________________________________How often you attend ____________________________________________When would be the best time to interview your:father? Please answer freely, all answers are confidential. If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be: ______________________________________________________________B.
__Yes __No (IF YOU ANSWERED ' YES' TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY.
Do you have an earring, nose ring, pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring?